Now That She's Gone
by TheTiredWriter
Summary: ENDGAME SPOILERS! What do they do now that she's gone? Or each of the Avengers going through the stages of grief after Natasha's death.
1. Chapter 1

Hey guys! I saw something on Pinterest the other day that showed how each of the Avengers symbolized each stage of depression after Natasha's death. This is my take on the five surviving Avengers during and after the scene at the lake. Obviously, there are Endgame spoilers ahead. DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything. 

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_Denial_ "_Why are you acting like she's dead?" _ Thor didn't understand. They had all six infinity stones in their possession, making all of them the most powerful beings in the universe. Surely, the stones could undo death. Couldn't they? He had never been as close to Natasha as the others were. However, she was still his teammate. She was still his friend. Thor would miss sharing jokes and eating pop tarts with her. He loved her, just as much as any of the others did. Thor didn't believe that she was dead. She was out there, somewhere, just waiting for them to bring her back. Even if it wasn't the stones, there was something out there that could bring her back. Wasn't there? Deep down in the back of his mind, Thor knew that this false hope was the same he had for Loki. Every time his brother died, whether he fell into an abyss, got stabbed in the heart, or choked, Thor still believed that Loki would come back. He believed that the sun would shine on them again. 


	2. Chapter 2

Welcome back! I really liked writing this chapter so I hope you guys like it too!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything

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_Anger_

Bruce heard them bickering behind him.

"_You go up there, and you talk to him!" _

It didn't matter none of it did. She was gone. She wasn't coming back.

Bruce didn't know who to blame. Was it Thanos, because he was the one who put them in this situation in the first place? Was it Thor, for not going for the head when it mattered and then did when it didn't? Was it Scott, for bringing up the idea? Was it Tony, who created the goddamn machine? Was it Steve, for splitting them up into teams? Was it Clint, for being there with her and coming back with the stone? Was it Natasha, for throwing herself off of the cliff, for making the sacrifice?

Natasha. There was so much he wished he had said. Every time he tried, Bruce got scared and ran away. The first time it was another galaxy, the second time it was a gamma lab. He couldn't do it. He should have just said it. He should have just told her. Now it was too late.

He launched the bench across the lake.

"_She's not coming back," _

Three little words. It was those three little words that Bruce couldn't bring himself to say. He had five years to take his chance, but he couldn't do it. Who knew it could be so hard to say I love you?

Bruce made the decision to wield the gauntlet even before the opportunity arose. He was made for this, and even if he failed, if he died, he would get to be with the woman he loved again.


	3. Chapter 3

Welcome back! You guys are definitely in for a long one so fasten your seatbelts. This chapter was really hard for me to write mainly because I love Clint and Natasha and I never wanted anything bad to happen to them. Alas, the end had to come. I hope you guys are liking this story so far! I would love to hear your feedback!

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_Bargaining_

"_It was supposed to be me…" _

Clint didn't know what to say. He wasn't sure what he was supposed to say to them. All he could think of was, "It was supposed to be me." That was definitely the worst thing he could have said. But what could you say, when the only person in the world that you cared about was gone?

The others had left the dock nearly half an hour ago to work on the gauntlet. Clint had no intention to ever look at that fucking stone ever again.

"_She risked her life for that stone. She bet her life on it."_

It should have been him. It wasn't right, it wasn't fair. Why did she think his life mattered more than hers? They had both done horrible things, they had both done heroic things. They weren't supposed to live without each other. Clint put his head in his hands and sobbed. His best friend, his partner in crime. How was he supposed to explain to his kids that their Auntie Nat would never come to visit again?

Clint rubbed his eyes and looked up. There she was, standing right in front of him. She looked down at him, the sun at her back.

"Hey," she whispered.

All Clint could do was stare. She looked different. Her dark red hair was pulled up and she was wearing her favorite sweatpants-hoodie combo. This was his Natasha, only from 15 years ago.

"Nat," he murmured. "God, Natasha. I….I…."

She just smiled at him. "May I?" she said, gesturing to the spot next to him on the bench.

He nodded, still in shock. As she sat down, he realized that she had changed. Her hair was now at its more-recent bob. She was wearing a brown leather jacket that used to be his and a red shirt. He hadn't seen that jacket in ten years.

"Clint," Natasha looked him in the eye. "I know you don't understand right now. Hell, maybe you never will. But believe me, it was the best choice. It was the right one."

"'Tasha, are you really here? Am I losing it?" Clint's eyes welled with tears. "Please say you're here. Please say I'm not dreaming."

She grabbed his hands. He looked down, still trying to keep it together.

"Everything is going to be fine. I promise." Natasha's voice remained steady, despite her shaking hands.

Clint looked at her again. This Natasha was from 5 years ago, just after the snap. He saw her on TV, with her icy blond hair and hardened green eyes, urging everyone to continue their searches, because their loved ones might still be out there. That day, Clint ran away. Natasha told him to reach out, but he ran as far as possible from anyone who would want to reach him.

"Clint," Natasha tried again, sensing that his attention was elsewhere. "listen to me. I believe in you. I know that this will work and that you can go home and-"

"Stop!" He screamed at her, abruptly standing up. "Just stop! You left Natasha! You left me alone! You left me in this world where you're the only one that was here for me! What am I supposed to do without you?" He turned around to face her.

"_Whatever it takes."_

She was staring into the void of space, her elbows on her knees and her hands clenched. A sloppy, multicolored braid sat on her leather-covered shoulder. This was yesterday. She had been sitting on a rock in that same position just yesterday. It was the last time that they would sit together. The last time they'd ever see each other.

After a while, Natasha met Clint's gaze. Her glossy emerald eyes were filled with unshed tears.

"I told you, whatever it takes. But somehow, you still can't seem to understand that it means some of us won't come home in order for everyone to win,"

"It was supposed to be me," Clint responded through clenched teeth.

"No, it wasn't," She smiled, causing a single tear to cascade down her face. "It was always going to be me. I made you a promise that you would see your family again. I gave you that hope."

She rose from the bench, standing beside him. As she turned towards the lake, she took his hand and whispered, "I love you, you know that right?"

Clint turned too, praying that this moment would last forever.

"I know, Nat. I know."

"I think we're even now. I think I paid off my debt."

Clint bowed his head, tears running down his face. "Natasha, you-"

"Shhh. It's okay. Everything will turn out fine. I know it will."

Her grip loosened. He turned to look at her, but she was gone.

"Thank you, Tasha." He breathed. "I promise I won't let you down."


End file.
